Sunday 5 February 2012

marriage

i have had this blog for quite some time now without any posts of course, because i couldn't seem to figure out how to start writing. initially, i had thought i would use ths blog to rant about all the problems, fights that i had with my husband. i felt that would be a little therapeutic, all the venting out etc., but somehow it just didn't seem right. my husband and i do fight, more than ever now, but the bitterness kind of vanishes very quickly and i am filled with love for him all over again, very quickly. so, i waited. waited for the right time to start blogging, on a happy note.


So this first post on my blog is on a day when a beautiful couple i know celebrate their 6th wedding anniversary. their love story is a very mughal-e-azam kind of story, with lot of drama and struggle as the girl had a tough time convincing her parents to let her marry the love of her life.


When I woke up today morning and remembered it was their anniversary, I was instantly reminded of a quote from a hollywood film "Shall we dance". the quote beautifully explains the simplicity of a marriage.


Beverly Clark: We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one's life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'." 


I just love the last line. it's a such a simple act of just witnessing somebody's life and in a marriage, we do this out of love not as a duty. It's such an unconscious, effortless thing, yet so amazingly deep. I mean, what does anyone want, but to have someone loving in their life, who notices everything they do.


As i write this post, I can think of yet another quote from yet another film, "Good Will Hunting". I am not sure how many of you have watched the film and i don't know if you have seen the film, you have noticed this particular quote/dialogue. 


“Sean: My wife used to fart when she was nervous. She had all sorts of wonderful little idiosyncrasies. She used to fart in her sleep. I thought I’d share that with you. One night it was so loud it woke the dog up. She woke up and went ‘ah was that you?’ And I didn’t have the heart to tell her. Oh!
Will: She woke herself up?
Sean: Ah...! But Will, she’s been dead for 2 years, and that's the shit I remember: wonderful stuff you know? Little things like that. Those are the things I miss the most. The little idiosyncrasies that only I know about: that's what made her my wife. Oh she had the goods on me too, she knew all my little peccadilloes. People call these things imperfections, but there not. Ah, that's the good stuff."



My husband farts in his sleep too, and when i tease him by calling him the official pollutant in the room, he says he is ambipur; the room freshner brand, spreading lovely fragrance even while asleep!


His little idiosyncrasies, that's what make him my husband.


:)